FELIZ ANO NOVO

Desejo um Feliz Ano Novo a todos. I wish everyone a Happy New Year

QUEIMA DE FOGOS EM COPACABANA

Copacabana

Onde minha lucidez se perdeu (não sei se de nervoso ou triste ou os dois me rio nesse momento rs rs) e começa a voltar só agora, talvez eu tenha lá sido só uma voz, mais um violão e um beijo só e nada mais, que eu me conforme agora...

Let me perish...

Once again I am here to say the words, the words that should not be said, that should not be told, anyway they are abhorring me on the inside and their will overcome mine. Let them out in such a time:

How could someone make me cry?, an act which was by me never had so sincerely, how could she make me long to lose my life after the deception?, how could she take my love and make my life brighter. And all of this she did in two days.

And must I say as well that the gravest love and the highest pain have had taken place at the very same time and that I had been fearing this since I looked into her eyes, since I first stared at her mind. I could not ever have such a perfection only for me, and now I have my gift, yes, for my arrogance of trying to hand myself it I have got my sorrow, my latest and hardest wound, the bleeding feeling of desire, of affection, the wounded heart...

I say that I should never have looked so deeply into her eyes. I should not have stared at those bright fountains of pureness. For now I suffer, and now I long back the most perfect night ever, I long for that moment to be never ended: the sweetest kiss that she gave me, the kiss which was my own and which is now gone.

Yes, I saw that kiss be gone whe she told me that she didn't want a thing from me, when no warmth came from her eyes any more, when I was sitting by her side asking silently for forgiveness and she did not even looked at my face as she used to do so may times and so passionately. Even though she kissed me one last time, she kissed our last kiss I guess, but why should it be the last? WHY? WHY?

I want to scream, I want run into her arms. I want all the things that I have always searched back to me.

I don't want to cry for her, however I do cry, I cry tears so heavy that I cannot hold my head and as I stare at the floor I let those most painful drops stream so resentfully, their are right now willing to come but I now will hold them back.

I want that December 25th night back, why had it needed to end, my Lord? Why can't I sing her some songs and believe that I can sing'em forever only for her and for her ears only? Why can't I seat on the sand, stare at the ocean, and at the moon and despite of these only in her eyes find true beauty? Why can't I fear falling in love again instead of suffering from losing it? Why can't I have her lips again? Let me know cruel world of disguise.

Why did I have to say those words, why did she look at me so coldly? And why do I cry when I remember the way looked at me? Why do I guess that I will never be able to touch her heart again? Will it be sealed for good or will it open again someday?

One thing I just do not understand is that how come something that was so meant to be fell apart? And by stealing someone else's words I can say that forever was the promise in my heart, now more and more I wonder where you are.

Right now I simply do not know if would it be better for me that she read this or that she would not ever notice my feelings.

Suddenly I'm not half the man I used to be, there's a shadow hanging over me. Why did she have to go?, I said something wrong, now I long for yesterday as some of greater sense said.

And how could I have been so much coward? I guess I am asking too much difficult questions which I simply don't have enough reasonable mind to wonder and answer, for I must be still a child. Maybe it was a dream, one of those that you can remember when you wake up, but only in small pieces that do not make much sense, and even so it was perfect for no sense has been there asked, not in the ground of love.

I would ask for forgiveness, for a second chance, 'cause I felt that freezing accent in her voice when I her to hear me and I guess it is now all over, maybe she will never take me back, maybe she haven't at any time wished to make me cry or suffer from yearning, from regret, from emotional touch touching my skin, and yet I suffer and cry.

Maybe this would not be so hard if the brightest face of hers wasn't so strongly written in my soul, so marked in my mind, in my skin. For she is running through my veins already so intensely and every time I breath I feel her flavor of sweetest thing, and even now to breath seems painful, for I guess that my breath will be denied from now on whenever I might ask her for it once again.

When will I realize my new end again I don't know and how was I to know if I cannot head anyplace, I guess I will take my normal life back on the path for that perfect life beside her seems to have vanished with three words:"Mais ou menos".

Now I guess that the strongest melancholy and sadness will take over me again. And yet I do not know what was so wrong in being sincere, yes, I tried to be honest in order to begin a new thing: a brand new love. But this brought me only such a pain, maybe anger for her, and must I pray that it be anger and not indifference, for if that might be so I'll be dead by the next morning.

I lost my love yesterday night but somehow I can carry on, even though I want it that way, even though I ask my love again. But now I can at least die in restless peace and at the very moment of my death may the Lord forgive me for my sin 'cause I begin to think that she will ever do so.

P.S.: In the end of this I cry once again and remember that way of look, those words, that voice...

Attraction and Love

I will simply lay some spared words here around for the desire of this poem falls upon the far object of sweet love.

Kind love,
Savage attraction,
Sweet mix
Where the grave sound of kiss and lick takes place,
When the restless lovers get to theirs wicked or higher ends,
For nothing may be left on the path
Of the savage, nor of the kind.

The reach of the hand may be not enough,
The skin would ever be the most wanted thing
For the love,
The desire,
The lust,
The possession,
The seduction
Will be in this ground asked and demanded.

On Affection

Once again must I say that none of this words are able to be soothed.

A candlelight coming
On the sparkling smile
The glowing shine
Of the inner affection.

No one but you
Can make me rather
staring at your bright face
Than breath the heavy air
Without your good smell,

Right now I can feel
Your touch in my mind

Sobre a Vida

A ella le regalo una poesia, algo sin grandes proporciones la mirada de mi ojo cálido sobre suya existencia iluminada, por la soledad que me causó la distancia y las fuerzas de mi voluntad sobre la locura. A Dani Schiavini.

A vida iluminada
Que passa sem perceber,
Em visão clara,
Um infinito inalcançável,
As pequenas coisas que me fazem lembrar,
Um banho de chuva,
O sol no rosto,
A franqueza,
A carência,

Tudo que um dia me passou
Parece ser de novo aqui pedido,
Aqui onde eu possa mostrar a ela o que é
necessário a vida,
A vida plena que um dia eu pensei encontrar.

De volta a luz ela me traz,
Mas, ainda assim, não sei se posso dizer algo da vida
Se ainda nem eu mostrei a mim o que ela seja,
Se um dia a visse daria um beijo e diria:
"A vida é branda e iluminada",
Se fosse r[apida seria a morte.
E que morte seria dela
Senão a mais doce ao seu lado.

Beijo-a na face
E me despeço
Com um riso cândido
E um pensamento
De que nunca vou deixá-la para trás.

Engano

Sobre o engano.

Portentosas imagens de entrega
Deixadas atrás dos pensamentos
Sem mais vontade de abnegar,
Pois logo depois da decepção intensa
Só resta o esquecimento
Ou a vontade dele.

Que ainda em um átimo que passa
Retorna o desejo de ter visto o engano,
De ter podido fazer de novo
Do modo certo,
O desejo de não confiar mais,
E ainda assim nao se desvencilha o amor
Daquele objeto de engano
Do erro final.

BACK TO THE DARK THOUGHT

Lately my texts haven't shown the dark side of mine which was stuck in the ground of weak demonstrations of useless life. Now I will be back to my darkened thoughts, back to the night of doom, of gothic tendencies, where my soul turns its face to the hatred which has been spared for long.

And wherever I look I see the damn of the ones who fall into the pit of shadows, where my lovely evil side appears so heavily and where the end seems to be closer. Only now can I see that every single act of mine is poisoned with bad things, with vain feelings, and even so I do not regret it a little.

Someday will I regret this words, and even now I do regret saying such miserable things, anyway this is what I fell right now around 9:40 o'clock in Brazil, Rio de Janeiro, during a melting summer or if not a summer I do not have any idea of which fucking station may I be on.

The only good feeling is the love wich I bend here inside, the love of the one that I cannot yet name for still it is in the shadow of the thought of mine, and I could in such a way name more than a thousand, not only persons, not only things, not only ideas... If I believed in hell would it be here? Right now everything becomes a nightmare, right now when all of my life is among perfections and where the songs may be sung happily, but with such a great resentful accent that any joyful word would seem like a scar, a wound, a pain which is now disguised.

Right now I am hearing Nightwish, and its obscure music makes me grow in my thoughts of darkness, of sweet kindness, of gentle lust. My sins are so small now, the idea of sin is so away from me that I could say lots of idiot things and even them would look like full of redemption, now must I stop saying what my heart tells me to say, for my heart was never a good emperor of my own life, too much suffering it has brought where only light should shine.

EU fantasiado pro Fórum

Apareço aqui de novo

Poema Instantâneo Sobre a Palavra "BEIJO"

Instantes de entrega,
Sem um fardo de prisão.
Soando livre.
Os sons das línguas
E dos lábios,
Sem nenhuma complicação.

Em um beijo de afeto ou paixão
Sem qualquer amor
Ou qualquer futuro,
(O beijo inconsequente e desavisado
De um jovem desejo)
Estariam os tristes fins da fidelidade.
Não fosse a carência que os vicia
A anuviada vontade do
permanecer.

Poema Instantâneo Sobre a Palavra "DÚVIDA"

Sobre a dúvida, não sei se as minhas ou as que em mim fazem efeito (será que há alguma diferença) :

Com resignações
Intensas e imanes,
Sem noções:
Do meu real.
Ou o que seja meu.
Me perco em dúvida,
Em desatino.

Longamente envolto.
Por penumbras sensíveis,
Por exemplos de obscuridade;
Onde até luz se parece a negativos,
Tremores de convicção.
Perdido em mim mesmo,
E em todo o mundo.

Poema Instantâneo Sobre a Palavra "SAUDADE"

A um só ser, um único poema, um único e nunca mais repetido.

Consternado pelos autos de loucura,
Me decreto cá em meus anseios:
Os perdidos e os relaxados prazeres,
Sem qualquer foco ou sensação
Já misturados a reminiscência inócua
De algo que me perdeu
Ou que por mim e a mim foi escrutinado
Pela distancia
Ou por atos inconsequentes
Ou por mera necessidade voraz.

Não tanto pela distância
Ou pelos metros,
Nem o tempo
Que me separam dos desejos
Que assaz já me devoram o senso,
E me enegrecem o juízo.

Me vejo sem
companhia,
Nem favor,
Nem beijo,
Nem um fogo de paixão,
De loucura lassa.

Onde esta meu
querer?,
E onde mais
nostalgia?
Onde mais vontade?
Onde mais volições?
Onde mais luxurias?
Onde mais saudade?
Onde mais saudade?
Onde ?

EU NO ORKUT

QUEM QUISER ME ADICIONA, MAS TEM QUE DEIXAR UM SCRAP PELO MENOS

Eu e Karla no MSN

Essa imagem foi mandada pela Karlinha, minha colega na Fculdade de Direito e amiga, que adora minhas caretas,

para se chegar a essa careta foram tiradas outras tantas que me desagradaram, porém um bico é até charmoso, sugiro que se clique na foto para vê-la em tamanho original lol...

Poema Instantâneo sobre a Palavra "SEDUÇÃO"

Me brinda a suave luz do prazer,
A inerte conexão de desejo,
Que sofro dos seus olhos;
Dos seu toque;
Da intrepida palavra de despudor;

Os meros enlaces de sedução
Que me conseguem anuviar a percepção
Que cegam-me os olhos
E trazem o teu beijo
A memória sem embargo perene
De tudo que eu conjecturo sobre teu corpo,
E lábios e beijos,
Um turbilhão de sensação...
A sedução enfim...

Instant Poem On the Word "MIND": the second I Guess

This I made for my sweetie cousin. She might like it I guess...

Looking forward
Where my sick soul turns
Upon the restless pit of doom
I find the assumed wicked ends of the existence.

And around there,
At the very ground of the sacred thoughts
My mind gets into a deicide;
And fails to possess any faith or belief.

Thus it tries not to show
Its doomy tendences.
And at this very moment,
I hide them:
For they were never meant to be shown.

BORED = DE SACO CHEIO

Bored for having to update this damn blog in order not to lose my public...

=

De sacho cheio por ter que atualizar essa porcaria desse blog pra não perder meu público.

Poema Instantâneo sobre a Palavra "Flor" : O segundo

Envolto nas frígidas consequências de Amar
Por vezes, perdendo as noções objetivas
Do querer real e da possessividade
Quero renegar todo pesar anterior
E toda a distancia vencer
Para tocar novamente
A pálpebra dos seus olhos,
A boca do seu beijo
A flor do seu prazer...

Poema Instantâneo Sobre a Palavra "Oceano"

Escrevi para ela que me faz pensar nela sem me pedir que o faça, que me faz querer estar onde não posso e que me faz acima de tudo tremer de desejo resignado, não sei como, mas me enlouquece tu nesses tempos de incerteza, mas ver-te será a perfeição utópica.

Entre seu belo e sereno ser
Rogando por prazer instantâneo,
Vou-me perdendo
No seu colo,
E sugando toda a sua lascívia.

Olhando seus olhos
Se fecharem
E compulsivamente me fitando
Com paixão e luxúria,
Tornando meus desejos ainda mais convulsivos.

E no fim,
Quando em um espasmo
Orgásmico de loucura
Me sinto beijando o seu oceano
De lúbrico gozo,
E levemente embebido nele
Repouso em seus beijos.

.

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Wassup yo?

I guess that in this picture I look like saying hey!